Time Machine...yeah right.

I saw a billboard with a picture of some exercise equipment, an all-in-one workout contraption.  The slogan began: "Time machine...."

My mind jumped to the conclusion that exercising would make you appear and/or feel younger, thus taking you back in time.  But then I continued reading: "...it can take you back to size 5."

How disappointing.  Who says 5 is the optimal size?  What does that say about all other body shapes and sizes?

Way to fuel the distorted body image problems that plague our society, advertisers.  Here's my fitness rebuttal for advertising campaigns such as that...

TAKE A HIKE!

Ever hopeful.

I started this blog to help with my healthy eating challenge in 2011. That year I posted 368 times. Last year, in 2012, I posted 50 times. That might seem like almost once a week...if only that were true!  In reality, there were months that I didn't post at all.

On December 30, 2011, I posted about finally understanding why I overeat (see: Day 364 -- Reflecting), and I set out in 2012 to work through some issues. It was a journey. A bumpy, knock-me-to-my-knees, journey. Halfway through the year, I was directed to write about my life (see: "Give me this mountain!"), starting with my earliest memory and working my way forward. (I'm almost done with the Third Grade now...that's right...I'm crawling through the process.)

Along with writing my memoirs, I was prompted to seek counseling to help me through the issues. I chose a therapist who was also a performer, hoping she could understand not only my struggles with emotional eating, but also the creative blocks. On the creative side she was somewhat helpful, but on the eating side she could not relate. At all.

I switched therapists, and that was an excellent decision. My new therapist immediately had me listen to a CD series by Geneen Roth, When Food is Food & Love is Love.  For anyone struggling with emotional eating, I highly recommend listening to those.

At the end of 2011, I had lost weight in spite of my frequent problems with emotional eating, but that's just it...I still had my problems of emotional eating even while eating healthy! On Geneen's CD, she said:

"When you lose weight [through dieting], you don't lose the reasons you turned to food to begin with. You don't lose the reasons you ate. You don't lose your sadness, you don't lose your sorrow, you don't lose your suffering, you don't lose your loneliness. When you lose weight [counting calories, points, carbs, fat grams...] you are still the same person looking out at the world through eyes that don't like yourself, through disappointed eyes, through suffering eyes, through eyes that believe you're flawed in some way."

What does she recommend, if not dieting? She has some guided meditations to help deal with issues about food and love, and she recommends the following guidelines:

• Eat when you are hungry. (Truly hungry, body hungry, not head or heart hungry.)
• Eat sitting down in a calm environment. This does not include the car.
• Eat without distractions. Distractions include radio, television, newspaper, books, intense or anxiety producing conversation and music.
• Eat only what your body wants. (Not what your eyes want or your mind thinks it should have.)
• Eat until you are satisfied. (Not stuffed, not completely full.)
• Eat (with the intention of being) in full view of others. (Not sneaking.)
• Eat with enjoyment, gusto, and pleasure.

Does any of that ring a bell?  I was on the right track in 2011 when I challenged myself to eat when physically hungry and stop when full. 

In 2011, while faithfully keeping this blog, I lost 30 pounds. In 2012, I spiraled out of control while facing my demons with emotional eating, and gained 15. It's miraculous that I only gained that amount. When I used to eat sweets, I would easily gain everything back and then some. So I will take the 15 pound weight gain rather than 40.

Now it's a quarter into 2013, and I although I am still struggling, I am ever hopeful.  I only fail if I quit trying.  I will continue to heal.

And I'm ever hopeful I can be more diligent in blogging about my journey.

Body Image

Wow, it's hard to get started again after a long absence from posting on here. I had good intentions, and even wrote many a blog entry--in my head--but just couldn't seem to conjure up the time needed to post. I thought giving myself permission to post "first draft" writing (see: Back to the Dailies) would help, but it didn't.

I want to change the title of this blog to reflect on more complete health, not just healthy eating. I need healthy balance in my life, including mental, physical, emotional, social, and spiritual health. Just focusing on eating seems incomplete now, although during 2011 it helped me immensely.

Weighing on my mind lately is my body image. I didn't realize how poorly I viewed myself. Really. I became more aware of this when someone (okay, fine, I admit it was my therapist) suggested I keep track of any negative thoughts for a week. Prior to that, I actually considered myself a fairly positive person. Keeping track of my negative thoughts, however, took me by surprise. Nearly all of the negative thoughts that entered my head had to do with my self-image. I was stunned. By the end of that week, I began to wonder if there was anything I did like about my physical body, and after a mental assessment I came up with a few positive things, but even those were accompanied with disclaimers.

• I like my hair. But I wish I was better at styling it.
• I like my eyes.  
• I like my fingernails. But I need to take better care of my cuticles...and polish my nails.

Most everything else, I was not happy with.

So...I can find positive things to say about almost anything or anyone...but not about myself. I knew I had a few hang-ups about my body, but I truly did not realize just how negative I was about it. I'm trying to be kinder and more accepting of myself, but it's hard.

Last fall I spent three days as a "background talent" for an amusement park commercial. I could ride zipping roller coasters, but what really took an act of bravery on my part was donning a swim suit for the water park scene. Me? Be seen by cast and crew in my bathing suit? The thought was horrifying! And the thought of possibly being seen on TV in that state of dress sent cold chills throughout my body.

After much fear and trembling, I decided to face it head on. I took my swim suit and a pair of shorts to wear over it. When "wardrobe" came around, she must have sensed my uncomfortableness, and told me I could wear a pair of capris and a shirt. She did not want me to feel uncomfortable. But I told her I wanted to accept myself the way I am. So she suggested, "How about wearing your swim suit with a pair of capris?" I agreed.

That was struggle enough for one day, I think. I tried not to worry about my "lunch lady" arms. I tried not to compare my body to others. Not saying I was always successful, but I felt like it was a big step in self-acceptance. Yes, it used to be in better shape when I was young. Yes, my sugar addiction, although in recovery now, caused obesity which stretched out my skin. Yes, I'm fighting the ill effects of previous years of bad health habits. But I can't change those things. All I can do is move forward and do the best I can do with what I have now.

So somewhere in a commercial that will air this spring, I am wearing my swimsuit and capris and stepping out there into self-acceptance.

I might need a tranquilizer when it airs.

Health Screenings

Today my husband had a routine health screening: the dreaded colonoscopy.  (You're going to stick what up where??)

Although we exercise and eat healthy, it's important to have health screenings, and I'm glad my husband did not put up a fuss about going in.  He has a history of colon cancer in his family, so he might have inherited the tendency towards that disease; and because of that history, he needs a colonoscopy every three years.  He says, "My parents aren't alive, so I can't slap them."

After the procedure, the doctor came into the recovery room and told Kurt, "You are one of the healthiest eaters I know.  If anyone ever tries to tell you different, you have them see me because I have proof." (Ahem, and I like to take credit for preparing healthy foods.)

Kurt was also praised on his weight loss.  Most important, he has no sign of any cancer and a clean bill of health.

I couldn't find an image for colonoscopy.
Aren't you glad?  We don't need to see
that, right?

Hopefully our healthy lifestyle will keep us around for many, many years, but health screenings give us peace of mind and a chance for early detection if something is amiss.

For more information on what health screenings are recommended according to age and gender, here's a link for the Mayo Clinic:
Health Screening Guidelines

"Think on these things..."

When I read scriptures, I try to think of how the verses I'm reading might apply to me or to my situations. Recently, I prayed for help in eating healthy (as I often do) and then opened the Bible. I read Philippians 4:8 (King James version). "Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."   

In the past, whenever I read that verse, I applied it to what I might be viewing, reading, or participating in; but this time, because of healthy eating on my mind, I saw it in a different light.  Here are some of my thoughts:

...whatsoever things are true ... Truth is something that endures forever. If something is true now, it will be true tomorrow. It doesn't change. This tells me to avoid fad diets, and eat the foods that have been and always will be healthy: fresh vegetables, fruits, nuts, grains...

...whatsoever things are honest  ... I need to be honest with myself (is that really the best food choice available?). Be honest about hunger and fulness (am I truly hungry, or do I just want to eat?). Be accountable and honest.  

...whatsoever things are just  ...  There are consequences - just consequences - to actions, good or bad. When I eat healthy, I can expect better health, more energy, a clear mind, and better moods. When I eat poorly, I can expect weight gain, fatigue, fuzzy mind, and diminished health. Eating like a pig will bring consequences, and they are just. Eating healthy brings consequences, and they are just too!

...whatsoever things are pure ... Eat as wholesome and natural as I can. The fewer hands that have handled my food, and the least processed, the better.

...whatsoever things are lovely ... Make meals attractive. Eat a variety of foods and rejoice in their colors, flavors, textures, and beauty.   

...whatsoever things are of good report ... Every day, it seems, there are new reports on diet research and health, often with contradicting ideas. I need to carefully consider the source (who funded the research) and their agenda. Some researchers report "good" numbers for weight loss, but it doesn't mean it's a healthy method of losing weight.

...if there be any virtue ... (Virtue: a standard of right; beneficial quality or power of a thing; strength or courage; commendable quality or trait; capacity to act.) Select foods that give my body benefit, power, or strength. I have the capacity to act on good choices. I can act (make healthy choices) rather than be acted upon (blame circumstances or eat something because someone else insists).

...if there be any praise ... Acknowledge my successes. Be grateful and praise God for the healthy foods available. Thank God for His Divine help and support. Tell others.

...think on these things ... Think on the positive and good. Think about making healthy choices.  Envision good health and a clear mind. Avoid negative thoughts. Don't let thoughts dwell on foods that are unhealthy. Think on the true, honest, pure, good report, just, virtue, and praise. Think how they apply to healthy eating and rejoice!

Healthy bundle of joy.

Our newest grandbaby arrived into the world Tuesday morning, April 3.  She seems perfect in every way, and I marvel at the miracle...not only the miracle of life, but the miracle of how so many babies can arrive in such perfect condition when so very many things can (and do) go wrong.  What a blessing to have a healthy little bundle added to our family.

I'd write more, but I need to go kiss some soft little newborn cheeks, and play with her brother and sister.

Stop being efficient.

Years ago I talked with a therapist and expressed how I tried to be efficient with my daily tasks.  I told him how I dove-tailed many chores, and even kept a basket at the stairway to collect items that needed to go up the next time I went.

"Stop being efficient, " he told me.

"Huh?"

"You could use a few extra trips up the stairs."

Ouch!

But he was right.  And I thought of him yesterday as I did laundry -- making a trip up the stairs after each load, and back down the stairs with the next.

Often the least efficient way for chores (and transportation) is the most efficient for our health.

Advice taken.

Several weeks ago, a friend of mine asked her Facebook friends what they suggested to help get rid of her headaches.  She was suffering from frequent severe headaches, especially after heavy exertion in exercise.  Doctors were unable to diagnose a reason, so she turned to her friends.  She received many suggestions, and I almost didn't post anything, since most of my friends don't like to hear what I have to say about health and nutrition, but I decided "what the heck" and told her that I got rid of my severe headaches by eliminating sugar and artificial sweeteners.

Recently she told me that she had decided to take my suggestion, and was surprised (and pleased) how quickly her body responded to the change... no more headaches!

I felt pleased that she had the courage to eliminate sweets, but mostly I was pleased that she found relief from the pain!

Hmmm...I see!

I've been having a bit of eye strain, and since my eyeglasses are old, I made a trip to the optometrist to get a new prescription.  I was stunned when he told me the problem... my eyesight has improved, so my eyes are straining with glasses too strong for them.

Huh?

I've been wearing glasses since I was in the third grade, and each time I purchased new frames, it was always with stronger prescription lenses than the ones before.  (Thank goodness for modern lightweight, thin, plastic lenses because mine would look like coke bottle bottoms if I had to use the old time "glass" glasses.)  As my near-sightedness increased over the years, sometimes the change was slight, but it was always for the worse, and never the better.

So I find it interesting that after a year of eating healthier and striving to avoid processed foods, my eyesight improved.  Coincidence?  Maybe, but... I clearly see another reason to keep eating healthy!

DAY 355 -- Prescription for long living.

Okay, maybe you've figured out by now that I enjoy the Reader's Digest.   I have some more health tips from the current issue.  [The headings in bold are from the article, followed by my summary, paraphrasing, and personal input.]

How to Live to Be 100


1.  Stop smoking.  This greatly reduces the risk of heart attack four years after stopping.  And the risk of lung cancer falls significantly after ten years of being smoke free.    

2.  Exercise daily.  The article suggest 30 minutes of activity, even if it's broken down into three ten minute segments.

3.  Eat five servings of produce daily.  

4.  Get screened.  Make sure we get the screenings recommended for our age bracket.

5.  Get plenty of sleep.  See?  It's a good thing I chose sleep last night, rather than posting!!  (Whew, I'm off the hook.)

6.  Ask your doctor about low-dose aspirin.  They recommend not starting on your own, since there are risks with aspirin.

7.  Know your blood pressure.  It's recommended to keep blood pressure under 120/80.

8.  Stay connected.  Having connection with friends and family helps us live longer.  So, I extended my life today by going out to dinner and a movie with my husband and close friends!

9.  Cut back on saturated fat.  (It causes bad cholesterol...LDL.)

10.  Get help for depression.  Sometimes we don't realize that ongoing bad moods can effect our physical health and shorten our life span.

11.  Manage stress.  I was surprised to read that "uncontrolled stress is more destructive to your health than being 30 pounds overweight."

12.  Have a higher purpose.  "By giving back, you give to yourself."

That's the Reader's Digest prescription for living to 100.

Here's my 101-year-old uncle's secret to longevity: 

• Keep the bowels moving! 
• Drink plenty of water. 
• Eat lots of vegetables. 
• Eat alfalfa. 
• And lots of watermelon.

DAY 344 -- Warning! Not for weak stomachs.

I checked a book out of the library titled The Secret Lives of Hoarders, written by Matt Paxton, one of the organized cleaning experts on A&E's "Hoarders."  I wanted to read it partly out of sheer curiosity, but also because I know someone suspected to be a hoarder (I'll call her Helga) and I wanted to understand her.

Ugh.  If you ever want to kill your appetite, read this book!  *shudder*  The following excerpt made me gag.  Warning:  do not read if you have a squeamish stomach.

     "... She guessed that her refrigerator hadn't been opened in sixteen years--there was too much clutter stacked up in front of it.  As soon as we cracked it open, two of my workers started vomiting.
     "The bins and drawers were full of dark liquid and two inches of green black muck that had once been lettuce.  We found black eggs, which at first we thought were carved stone eggs.  The food was so moldy that it had all grown together into one gnarly mess"  (p. 26, italics added).

Oh. my. goodness.

Paxton mentions that most hoarders (especially in advanced stages) are obese because they live on junk food due to the inability to access their kitchens for cooking.  Thankfully, that is not the case for Helga... yet.  She still cooks, and actually prepares beautiful, fairly healthy, meals.  (But good luck finding a clean plate or a place to sit.)

And now, after reading the book, I am worried about Helga's future.  The author states that hoarding becomes increasingly worse until the person seeks help.  Helga used to be somewhat meticulous in housekeeping and organization.  I loved visiting her home. But over the past twenty years I've seen her house swell with clutter and stuff she cannot part with. When I travel to her town, I can no longer spend the night at her place since the spare bedrooms are filled to the brim.  If this continues, what will her health and living conditions be like in another twenty years?

At this point Helga doesn't recognize the severity of the problem, and gets angry if anyone broaches the subject.  It's like that for any addiction.  We have to reach a point of wanting change before we can start a path to better health.

DAY 334 - Flaxseed

I take two tablespoons of ground flaxseed a day, one in the morning and one at night, with a glass of water. I've done this for years because I read an article about how it is healthy for a woman to do that; however, it's been so long I can no longer remember the reasoning behind it.  But I do it anyway.  

Typically, I get ground organic flaxseed from a health food store, but I've had a vacuum sealed bag of whole flaxseed on my shelf for a few years.  I never bothered with it until recently because I didn't have a grinder.  I kept thinking I would get the grain grinder that attaches to my Kitchenaid mixer, but it never seemed a priority purchase.  In the meantime, we bought a small hand grinder to use in an emergency.

Well, sometime last month as I was leaving for work, I mentioned to my husband that if he wanted some entertainment he could grind some of the whole flaxseed with that little grinder... just enough to fill the small container I use for ground seed.  Being the kind and caring man that he is, I came home to freshly ground flaxseed.

Last night I used the last of it and needed to grind more, so this morning I pulled out the grinder and started to grind.  And grind.  And grind.  I was rapidly getting a sore arm and only had a teeny tiny pile of the ground seed to show for it!!  At this point my husband told me it had taken him forty minutes to grind the previous batch.  Forty minutes!  Oh my goodness that's true love!  

"Are you kidding me?"  I asked.

"Nope."

"There's gotta be a better way!"

With that, I pulled out our blender, dumped in some seed and hit the button labeled Grind. Woolah.  I had a batch of flaxseed ground to perfection in a few blinks of the eye.  You should have seen the look of disbelief and disgust on his face! 

I grinned.  "Honest... honey, I never even thought of using the blender until now!"

They say that necessity is the mother of all invention... well... I think laziness plays a large part too.

DAY 329 -- Hold the sugar please!

My husband I went to lunch earlier this month at a locally owned restaurant (not a chain).  When we were finished with our meal, the waitress came to our table and plopped down two desserts, "We're having a special of free carrot cake with your order!"  We explained (kindly) that we did not want the free dessert; please remove it from the table and give it to someone else.  She felt bad and apologized for not asking us first, vowing to remember to ask others in the future.

We didn't mean for her to feel bad.  We could have just left the dessert on our table and not said anything about it, but we knew the dessert would be tossed if we did that.  This way, she was able to take them away, right then, knowing they were untouched by us.

Then last weekend I attended a large event for women (Time Out for Women).  I was with my sister-in-law, two of her daughters, and another niece.  When we entered the convention center on Saturday morning, they were handing out chocolate truffles.  Three of the five of us declined due to 1) diabetes; 2) severe sensitivity to sugar; and 3) sugar addiction.  I wondered what percentage of the 5,000 women in attendance were unable to accept the free chocolate, or perhaps should not have taken it but could not withstand the temptation.

I was thinking... it sure would be nice, in both scenarios, if we were offered the option of free fruit!

DAY 324 -- Some foods are a pain in the head.

Yesterday a friend suffered from a migraine...again.  She gets them frequently, and I've already preached the sermon, "Get off the caffeine, sugar, and especially artificial sweeteners!"  So I said nothing.


But it reminded me of something I needed to add to "My Story" on this blog.  I posted a list on that page of all the changes I've experienced since I stopped eating refined sugar, but forgot (until today) to include that I rarely get headaches now.  I used to get frequent headaches (several times a week), some of which were severe to the point of vomiting.   


Now, when I do get a rare headache, I can usually link it to something I've eaten.  I no longer eat at Pei Wei restaurant because each time I ate there (three times) I ended up with a headache.  Also, because my body is sensitive to sugar, I don't eat fruit on an empty stomach or I can count on a headache as the result.  I eat fruit with a meal; or for a snack, I include nuts, cheese, or plain yogurt.


Now and then I get a headache from something I've not eaten enough of: protein. Thankfully, I can usually feel that type of headache coming on and avoid the problem by eating some cottage cheese.  If I don't catch it in time, then I take some medication along with a boiled egg.  


I know I'm judging by my own experiences, but I am of the strong opinion that most severe headaches are linked to diet.

DAY 319 -- Servings of fruit and vegetables.

I find dietary guidelines confusing.  Some guidelines suggest five servings of fruits and vegetables a day.  If I eat five servings of fruit, am I done for the day... no need for veggies? And what amount counts as a serving?

Out of curiosity, I looked up the dietary exchange listed for the Mayo Clinic .  Their list shows a serving size for an apple is 1 apple... but then it clarifies that with "small (2 inches across)" and should be  4 ounces.  We have what I would consider small apples, so I weighed them. Each one weighed over 7 ounces.  So if I eat one of our apples, I'm actually getting nearly two servings of fruit.

A serving of banana is 1 "extra small" (4 oz, including the peel).  I weighed our only remaining banana.  (Note to self: get bananas.) It's 5.5 ounces, and it's a lot smaller than the ones we usually purchase.

The list shows 1/2 pear is a serving.  So if I eat the whole pear, I'm getting two servings.

Why am I posting about this?  I don't know.  

Personally, I don't weigh and measure food, or worry about portions.  I guess I had this on my mind because I overheard someone say it is difficult to get 5 servings of fruit and veggies into a day.  But looking at the recommended serving sizes, if I eat one apple, one pear, and one banana, I've already eaten approximately 5 servings of fruit, and haven't even counted any servings of vegetables yet. 

Which brings me back to the question... if I've eaten 5 servings of fruit, do I forgo vegetables for the day?  Of course not.  When I read Food Matters (by Mark Bittman) he said that as long as our diet does not consist of junk food, then we will get the nutrition we need.  I like that.


I try to eat balanced, and include a variety of foods from a variety of food groups.  I wondered why the government feels the need to give guidelines and recommendations to get people caught up in how many servings of what... why not just let people use common sense?  But then I remembered yesterday's post about Dumb Diets and realized that some people are a few senses short of common.

DAY 313 -- Obesity and the brain.

Last night on Biggest Loser, a doctor from Johns Hopkins (Dr. Linden) shared some information with the contestants.  He's a brain scientist studying how the brain experiences pleasure from food.  It was an interesting segment.  Here are the things Dr. Linden shared:

• A lean person does not crave food as much as an obese person (no surprise there) but the lean person gets a greater pleasure response in the brain when eating.  An obese person ends up eating far more in order to get the same amount of pleasure response in the brain.  Dr. Linden suggests that obese people don't necessarily overeat because of wanting more food, but because they are less satisfied when they eat.
• Stress hormones go right to the brain and cause cravings (especially for comfort foods).  He recommended exercise, meditation, and playful recreation to reduce stress.
• Be mindful when eating.  Sit at the table and give full concentration to the experience of eating.  (Don't eat while distracted, like in front of the TV.)
• We can "rewire" our brains to enjoy healthier foods and healthier eating habits.  It can take weeks... or months.  However, our brains will quickly revert to the old "wiring" when we eat poorly.  So, for instance, if a person decides to live it up on vacation and strays from the healthier diet, the brain quickly re-wires or reverts back to the old habits.

Obesity and the brain.  Mind over platter.

DAY 289 -- Weight report.

For several months I didn't weigh myself.  I was overeating, and really should have weighed, but I neglected it.  So, when I decided to set a contract type goal with stickK.com, I figured it was time to step on the scale.  Even though I had gained some weight, I was actually surprised and pleased to see the gain was minimal.  I had not weighed since July 4, yet when I weighed on Sep. 30, I had only gained 2.5 pounds.  


Now for the good news... it's been two weeks since I started my contract not to overeat, and I've already lost 4.5 pounds.  That's fantastic!  There is no doubt that eating natural foods is the way to go.  With three months of overeating I only gained 2.5 pounds, and in two weeks of paying attention to actual hunger and fulness, I lost all of that, plus an additional 2 pounds.  Amazing.  


(For those who might be new to this blog... I do not count calories, fat grams, carbs, or portions.  I am trying to let my body tell me when it's time to eat and when it's time to stop, and eat mostly natural, very little processed.)


In years past, I've tried "diets" where I restricted calories or what have you, and would lose about 20 pounds, then gain 30... in a very short amount of time.   So far with My Healthy Eating Challenge, I have struggled often with overeating, yet I've lost 27.5 pounds since January 1.


My husband has lost 53 pounds.  PLUS, he no longer needs medication for blood pressure, cholesterol, thyroid, or diabetes. 


Healthy eating, and exercise, really does promote good health.  Go figure!  ☺

DAY 282 -- Anniversary of sugarholic recovery

Today marks 10 YEARS of Sugar Addiction Recovery for me.  Giving up refined sugar was one of the best things I've ever done.  I've had some people tell me, "Well, I am toooo addicted.  I could never stop eating sweets."  Those people assume that I must not have been very addicted if I was able to give it up... they have no idea the hellish addiction I had.

How did I do it?  How did I give it up?  With Divine help in taking one step at a time, one day at a time, until those one days accumulated into ten years.

To better understand my before and after, here's an excerpt from the "My Story" page on this blog...

MY SUGARHOLIC STORY:  When people find out I abstain from sugary foods, they usually say, "I could never live like that."  They don't understand... I was not living before giving up sweets.  I was existing, but certainly not living.  I existed in a world of mood swings, depression, fatigue, sickness, anger, and self-loathing.  I had dreams, but no oomph to follow them.

I reached a point where I was desperate.  I wanted to be well!  I wanted good health!  I made appointments with my gynecologist (were my hormones out of whack?); an allergist (were allergies making me sick?); and an internal medicine doctor.  Surely someone would have answers.  In the meantime, I poured my heart out in prayer.  This was nothing new, but perhaps I was finally in the right frame of mind to understand the answer: sugar addiction.  Just as surely as someone could be addicted to alcohol, I was addicted to sugar.  I realized that addiction runs in my family.  Alcohol.  Drugs.  Sugar was my drug of choice.  I realized that just as an alcoholic needs to avoid alcohol at all times (one should not tell an alcoholic, "It's your birthday, go ahead and have a drink!") I needed to avoid sugary foods, even on special occasions.

When this realization hit me, I stopped cold turkey.  It was October 9, 2001.  I went through about a week of withdrawals...and then...the cravings ceased, and I emerged into a whole new world!  I felt alive.  Really alive!  

I am a different person.  Here are some things that changed for me:

• Nearly every day of the week is a good day for me.  I used to have maybe one good day out of a week.  A good day for me is when I am productive and accomplish tasks.
• More energy!  Sure, I still get tired, but it is because I have been on the go all day long.
• No heartburn.  Before going off sugar, I used to have frequent heartburn.  I kept Tums in my purse, next to my bed, in the medicine cabinet.   Now I don't need them.  
• Better sleep patterns.  I go to bed early and arise early.  (I never dreamed I was actually a morning person!!)  I used to go to bed exhausted, have insomnia, and never feel awake even after arising.  I slept in any chance I could get and the only thing that motivated me to get out of bed was the thought of something yummy to eat.  Sugary cereals.  Donuts.  I used to have a sweatshirt that read: "Start every day with a smile and a donut...the smile is optional."
• No need for anti-depressants!  Prior to discovering my sugar addiction, I went on anti-depressants (off and on) always thinking they would help me feel better.  They did not.  Since avoiding sugars, I have never once felt the need for medication--and what's more, I feel mentally better than I ever did during the times I used anti-depressants.
• Fewer skin tags.  I used to have lots of skin tags all over my neck.  Most of them disappeared when I stopped eating sweets!
• Easier to donate blood.  When I was full of sugar, if I donated blood I became very light-headed and dizzy.  They would have to put ice packs around my neck and have me recline with my feet up for a long period of time until I could finally leave the blood mobile.  It was embarrassing, so I rarely donated.  Now, they take my blood, I hop up, grab a bottle of water and free T-shirt, and I'm out the door.
• Courage to do hard things.  Now when faced with a challenge I think to myself, "The Lord helped me quit eating sugar, He can help me accomplish (insert any difficult task) too.  

Freedom from addiction tastes far better than any sweet.  I don't want to enter that bondage--the prison of sugar addiction--again.

DAY 268 -- Food Matters Documentary

"Let Thy Food Be Thy Medicine, And Thy Medicine Be Thy Food." - Hippocrates

That is the theme of the documentary "Food Matters."  My husband and I finally watched the video on Netflix.  I found the documentary informative and interesting, and I highly recommend it.   (Here's a link to their website, where you can watch the trailer.)  Those interviewed in the film recommend vitamins, and eating a diet of mostly raw foods.  They claim that most diseases can be cured by good nutrition (which I agree with).  They cite research to back up their claims.

As a student of filmmaking, I want to clarify that information can still be presented in a biased way in a documentary -- especially when they don't give interview time to anyone with an opposing view (which this film is guilty of).  However, with that said, I appreciated when the documentary stressed that people need to be proactive about their own health, and that people are smart enough to figure out what they need, and what will work for them.

In the film, it seemed like most of those interviewed were of the opinion that medical providers do not discuss nutrition with their patients, and that if patients knew about nutrition and health, they would choose that alternative rather than go with a prescription.  That does not seem to be the case, at least not compared to what my husband experiences.  He is a health care provider, and strongly suggests nutritional and natural alternatives to his patients, but they refuse.  They tell him, "Just give me a pill."  They admit they don't want to exercise, and they don't want to bother with meal preparation (making healthy meals).

So, people might be smart enough to figure out what they need, but will many have the motivation or desire to even find out?

DAY 264 -- "Exhaust"-ed

Taking public transportation is supposed to be healthy for the environment, but after my experience today, I am wondering if it is healthy for me.


I had a doctor appointment today (routine yearly checkup) and decided to take the bus. Walking to the bus stop was healthy, especially since I got to the stop and realized that due to construction, I needed to walk even farther to a different stop so the bus could actually pull over.  


Extra walking.  That's healthy.  


The bus took me to a transfer point, where I boarded another bus, which sat and idled for about 10 minutes before departing.  I breathed exhaust as we waited.


Same thing on the way back home.  Took one bus to the transfer point, sat in an idling bus breathing exhaust for 11 minutes.  Then we got caught in construction traffic and I inhaled even more exhaust from the traffic around us (as well as the bus).


By the time I got home I was feeling ill and had a headache.  


The rest of the day I felt "exhaust"ed.