Last night my husband was pointing out my unusual callouses on the soles of my feet. I told him I have those marks so that when I am sunbathing on a crowded beach he can recognize me by the bottoms of my feet since my body will just blend in with all the other bikini clad women.
We both laughed over that. First of all... I don't even own a bikini. Second of all...let's just say I would not blend in at all. I am super white skinned, even when I have a tan. Third of all... let's not even get into body shape.
Speaking of body shapes, I just saw an article on realsimple.com about finding the perfect swimsuit for each body shape. It cracked me up that for the category of full hips and thighs all the swimsuits had some flourish that was supposed to distract the viewer from noticing the saddle bags. I'm sorry folks, but when my lily white drapery thighs (draping to my knees) are hanging out there, no bedazzled brooch, or fancy ruffle around the neck is going to pull a person's gaze away from my exploding biscuit dough legs.
Not one of the swim suits on that site offered the nice cover up shorts that I need. :-)